I'm sorry
by olga.travchuk
Summary: Filling gaps again. What was happened with Bobby and Athena in between their first argument and reconciliation in ep.1 s.2


**A/N: I'm filling the gap again. That first argument between Bobby and Athena left me speechless when I first saw it. Thanks God, they made it up really quickly in the same episode, if I remember right, but still I was thinking how hard it might be for Bobby. It would be hard even for me if someone, that I I date would say he's ashamed of being happy with me. So I decided to describe how they might work it all out. **

**Rated M. It's my first try to describe sex, I hope it's readable.**

**Sorry if I'm being too dramatic, too sensitive, sorry if you don't like it, sorry for my lousy English, but don't bother to let me know all of this if you hate it. I'm not here for anybody's entertainment, but my own enjoinment. **

**Thank you all, who left kind comments to my previous fics, I'm really happy if I brought you minutes of fun sharing my imagination. I don't own anything in this fandom except my mistakes.**

_\- Please, leave._ – cut Bobby and locked the bedroom door.

Athena sat kind of shocked under the table for a minute and waited if maybe Bobby will calm down. He didn't come out from bedroom even after she finished with her meal. She knocked on the door.

"Bobby, come on, come to me here, we need to talk! We didn't finish. Do you really think you can cut me off like that?"

She pooled the door knob, but still had no answer. Such a stubborn man, she thought. What does he imagines about himself?

"Okay! I'm leaving!" – She yelled, grabbing her purse and getting out of his condo.

She felt mad at Bobby. First, he tried to push her to do what she didn't want to do. Second, he kicked her out of his condo, while she was expecting a nice evening after exhausting working day, and really hot night in his arms. She was frustrated and furious. Third, she felt a little bit guilty for popping up the subject of him hiding his past. She could do better than that. She had to calmly explain him her worries and insecurities, instead of screaming at him and saying that she's ashamed of him. That was unfair, she knew that. But she didn't want to acknowledge that. She was emotionally drained after long and tough working day and all that she wanted after the dinner was good sex. Now all she received was an argument and frustration. She was pissed off.

She arrived to her house, kids were with Michael. What she was supposed to do this evening? Damn, was she mad! She dialed Hen.

"Hey, I really hope you can speak now…" - She started after hearing Hen's voice on the other end.

"I'm all ears. What's up, I can feel your anger in the air." – replied Hen.

"It's just really nothing, I need to vent, it's been a hard day. How are you doing today?" – Athena didn't want to open up everything to Hen, not yet, but she needed to keep herself busy somehow.

"I'm okay… You know the usual... Shift was crazy as always, but nothing that would make me think about it now." – Hen's voice was thoughtful. Something's definitely happened to Athena, but she didn't want to tell what exactly and it was strange. They used to have no secrets from one another. –" I don't push you to confess what it is with you, but I feel helpless to ease your mind, since I don't know why you are so mad, that my phone is almost trembling?"

"Well, maybe I had some conversation that didn't go the way I expected it. But I'm just not really ready to dive into details." – snapped Athena. – "Okay, I'm sorry, you are right. I have to tell everything or nothing at all. I'm just crazy now! Kids are with Michael. I planned to go out today, but it got canceled. So I'm alone for nothing. Anyway, I'll better try to get some sleep if nothing else. Sorry for disturbing you. Have fun with Karen and Danny."

"Ummm… Are you sure you don't wanna discuss this thing that bothers you?" – Hen wanted to make sure.

"Positive. But thanks for being ready to listen, girl. Good night y'all!" – Athena hung up the phone.

"Nite…" - Hen still tried to process Athena's strange behavior inside her mind.

After talking to Hen, Athena tried to have a relaxing bath. At least, some kind of fun for the body, she thought. Despite her hard tries to decompress, she couldn't think about anything, but Bobby. Wherever she stares she saw his sad eyes after her cruel words… The more she was thinking about it, the more she understood that she was terribly wrong to compare his tries to hide the disaster of his life with her own fear to tell the world that they are dating. And what is that overcame her, that she said she's ashamed of him for hell's sake… It was too much, too hurtful and too unfair for him. He might feel terrible now. And she started to feel sorry… She started to feel the need to talk to him. After some thinking, she decided to give herself more time. She wasn't ready to tell the world she's dating that man, so maybe he's just not the right one for her? She gotta think more about it, even if she missed him a lot and wanted nothing, but be in his bed now. …Why she just didn't tell him she was tired and had no energy to go out…?

LWLWLWLWLWLWLWLWLW

Bobby hadn't a great night either. Actually, he was devastated and didn't know what to do at all. It hurt like hell. He tried to not get offended on Athena, but he couldn't stop thinking that she pushed his most sensitive button, hit him in his weakest place on purpose. He trusted her like no one else and she always was so supportive. He thought they started to form some serious relationship and now this… She's ashamed of him. She doesn't want anything more with him, than having secret homey dates from time to time. Nothing more. Because she's ashamed of him. This means he was right, thinking that he has no chance to be forgiven and to start his life from a new page again, to be loved and appreciated, not only given a favor out of pity. What he was even thinking of when he believed that he can have it all again?!

He wasn't sure he slept at all that night and he came to work the next morning looking really awful. He was silent, he gave short one-word answers, when guys asked him something, he had a poker face all day long and looked like a robot while they served the calls. By all these signs Hen could say – Bobby was pissed off. Or crashed. Or both. She knew her boss, she learned him pretty well. Suddenly she remembered his dreamy looks, which he had for several months until now and then the same kind of looks had Athena. Now they both were in a huge negative mode. At the same time. That has to mean something, Hen thought.

"Bobby? What's up with you?" – she started. – "You're darker than a clouds right before the rain. Is something happened to you?"

Bobby raised his head on her trying to read if Athena shared something with her or not. But Hen's concern seemed genuine enough.

"Yes and no at the same time." – He responded. – "Nothing serious, nothing to care about, but just personal unpleasant conversation. Believe me, you don't really want to know."

He tried hard to distract himself with work from the painful thought that this thing with Athena (whatever it was), that gentle little flower in his soul how he feels it, doomed to die just being born. He had no idea why she even started all that if she's so ashamed of him and if all is so complicated. She wasn't a type of woman who'd venture some relationship just to have sex. He wasn't the best choice for it, she had plenty of more suitable guys around in her community for it. Yet, she was his true soul mate all these 4 months, he thought he could share everything with her. How could he be so deeply mistaken? Maybe his longtime loneliness got a bad joke with his feelings. He tried push all those thoughts aside until Hen comes to him with her questions.

"Okay", - told Hen . –" I wouldn't bother you with my questions, but you know you can always talk to me, right? And please, Bobby, talk to me first, before you even think of buying a bottle of alcohol… Agree?"

"Yes", - Bobby looked annoyed, - "I'm not that bad this time, don't worry. And thanks for your concern."

He tried to sound sure, but he wasn't in fact. He needed his sugar- drug named "Athena" for feeling good, but he knew he won't have her today and highly likely nevermore. He's not the first guy on Earth who failed in the personal stuff, but still he didn't know yet how will he cope with that. He has to invent some new method and reason for staying in this life and he had no idea what could it be. He didn't imagine that he won't see Athena here and there every day or he will see her, but only as a working partner. That all really got too deep and too serious for him. She already was in his blood.

He had a work to do though. And he had an obligation in front of himself, his priest, memory of his family, friends from AA and his team - to stay a decent man till the very end. So he finished his shift, collected his stuff as usually, went home, ate his dinner, had a shower and got to bed. A decent lifestyle.

LWLWLWLWLWLWLWLWLW

Michael brought kids back to Athena the next evening.

All her working day passed by like in an unconscious haze. She barely fixated events, suspects, colleagues, being submerged deeply in her inner dialog. She desperately needed to talk to someone about all this, but to whom? The idea of talking to Michael seemed to be crazy from the start, but then she realized, that he simply the one and the only, since she still didn't want to tell it to Hen. Bobby was Hen's boss after all and Athena didn't want to involve one more insider to the equation for Hen's own good.

So she talked to Michael, who convinced her that her fear of being hurt and embarrassed doesn't worth losing potentially good relationship that make her happy.

"_Our divorce wasn't a failure, Athena".- _said Michael. – "_We're still family, baby. And listen, if this thing doesn't work out with this firefighter, you'll move on. In the meantime, if he makes you happy, then why not be happy? You deserve it"._

Now Athena knew she has to talk to Bobby. And maybe to tell at least his team that they are together. She has to apologize to him and explain him what did she really mean and what she didn't. But what if Bobby was offended on her? Shit. That's going to be not an easy conversation. What if he changed his mind about her? What if he doesn't want to risk being traumatized by her again?

Several hours were spent on thinking how should she apologize best. First, she thought of doing it in private. But asking Bobby to go and have a private talk with her behind locked door would look suspicious for the team. What is the sense in it if she planned to let them know anyway? But what if Bobby will refuse to talk at all? No, he won't dare to play a drama in front of other people… He would listen. Well, if she has to do it in front of the people, her words might be short. Nobody of those people need their details and Bobby will perfectly aware of what she means. So be it. One word. She'll say just "Sorry" and then she'll kiss him in the lips, so everybody would understand what's going on without any further explanation.

Guys gathered on the second floor when she arrived to the station. She heard excited voices. Damn, looks like she's going to spoil their fun a bit. But having no better idea of how to act, she continued walking to kitchen.

"_I hope I'm not interrupting anything." – _Athena announced her presence, watching how Bobby's face expression changed from relaxed and laughing one to worried and uncertain. She could bet, he had no clue what to expect from her. –_ "Hey. I'm sorry." _She said kissing him on the lips as passionate as it was possible without using a tongue.

Bobby was shocked more than he could express. His heart raced inside his chest almost ready to jump out of it. SHE CAME! SHE APOLOGIZED! He didn't think it's even possible! Moreover, that she could do it in front of his team. Which means she's not only "ready" to open up, but she already let them know all by herself! Lord, was he happy! He's not alone again, they stay together!

"_All right. " – _He kissed her back, trying his best to hide own excitement. Now, Bobby, hold on, keep your mind focused, - he thought to himself, - keep your hands away from Athena until you'll stay behind the locked doors.

"_What are you all looking at? There are no more announcements." – _cut Bobby noticing Hen's face, which said she just saw a confirmation of her earlier ideas_._

"_Pay up." – _she said to others. Yes, they've made a bet for 20$ from each of them, that Bobby and Athena have dated. Hen was sure as a clear day, but all the rest couldn't believe it. To be honest, nobody could ever imagine Bobby being romantically interested in some woman. He always looked too cold, to restrained, could he even tell a joke for God's sake and entertain a girl? Chim remembered how he helped Captain to get properly dressed for the date, but could he expect that his date was Athena?!

"_[ALL GROANING] Wait a minute, wait a minute, you knew?"_\- Bobby was genuinely surprised, that Hen had definitely won the bet.

"_Sir, first you two were happy at the same time, then you were both pissed off at the same time. It wasn't hard to figure out."-_ answered Hen, who really put it all together couple of days ago.

"_And, uh, are you good with this?" – _asked Athena sheepishly. The only person, in front of whom she felt guilty, was Hen. What a friend she is – she didn't even share with her best friend such a personal stuff.

"_Girl, I'm just mad at myself for not fixing you up in the first place." _– smirked Hen. That was funny. Like if she'd ever could succeed "fixing up" Bobby or Athena with anybody on purpose… Those two were too stubborn and "unfixable" and Hen knew that perfectly fine. But she loved to think that all in all, it was HER friendship with both of them that helped to establish their primary connection.

"_Staying for dinner?" – _Bobby was happy like a child, but he needed a reason to take Athena off the stage of glances.

" _I don't know. Are you cooking?" – _Athena didn't expect his invitation for their usual family-kind-of-dinner at the station. Frankly, she didn't know what to expect at all, but for sure she didn't want to agree at once. She wanted Bobby to think that maybe, just maybe, she had other options in her mind, besides of being ready for anything, because she was happy about their reunion.

" _Yeah." _– Bobby responded with a sly smile on his face.

"I think we should leave for a while and talk in private somewhere…" – began Bobby while they moved towards the kitchen, hoping Athena will support his idea.

"But you promised them dinner… "- Athena sounded uncertainly.

"Waiting an hour wouldn't hurt anybody" – replied Booby. – "Let's go to my place".

LWLWLWLWLWLWLWLWLW

They broke into his condo so desperately like can be only people who wanted to go to the toilet too badly and were forced to wait for hours. It was a rare moment when level-headed Captain Nash completely lost control over himself.

He barely checked if the door was closed properly, when greedy hungry hands grabbed Athena's ass and pressed her against the wall. There was no past and no future for him. He lived in the process of unzipping and taking her uniform off.

He kissed her and bit her, the feeling of her bare skin and underwear under his palms made his dick get hard as iron. He undressed her frantically. The only fear, that he could hurt her, stopped him from tearing off her panties. "Animal, wild animal" – thought Athena to herself watching her delirious boyfriend. Did anybody ever saw Captain Nash being that crazy and completely consumed by desire, she wondered.

"Oh my God, how I missed you, baby" – Bobby whispered between kisses. – "I love you, Athena, I love you, I love you..." - He was kissing and licking her earlobes and neck. His eager palms freeing her wrists and placing directly to her breasts, erratically touching her body everywhere. Athena put her free hand to the back of his head and softly digs her fingernails into his hair. His passion was contagious. He kissed every inch of her body, every spot that his lips met on their way, rubbed his cheeks with its light evening stubble against her skin.

Athena felt like she was going crazy and losing herself in this animalistic battle. She couldn't hold on too long after his skilled and hungry tongue touched her clit. Her body reacted immediately. It took him six circles around her wet swollen clit to drive to her first climax.

"I'm coming, Boooobbbyyyy!" – Screamed Athena.

"Yeah, baby, that's it, come for me. I love you, I love you so much, yummy…"

They infected each other with passion.

He found her lips. Oh how much he dreamed of doing that these last days. He almost got insane picturing how he'd fuck her mouth with his tongue, how he'll bite her beautiful soft lips. And now he's doing this, doing this again and again, watching her beautiful face and hearing her moans... His palms were massaging her breasts. That breasts, oh boy, he dreamed to see them again so badly and here are them to bury his face in between them and rub his cheeks on its tender skin.

"You're gorgeous, you're goddess, Athena" - he whispers in trans.

Athena's hearing his words, feeling herself all on fire and already wet like an ocean, but still enjoying every touch of his big strong hands. He grabbed her head with both palms and fucked her mouth to the throat with his eager tongue. There was no place on her body, which was reachable to him now and which he didn't kiss and lick and suck. She felt so desirable that she had no bravery to imagine what it will feels like when he'll enter her core. Bobby was eating her breasts hungrily, sucking nipples desperately like for the last time in his life, slightly pinching them, controlling to not cause her any pain, and licking all over. Athena tried to suppress her moans as she realized she can't wait anymore.

"I want you inside of me, Bobby, right now, do this, baby, fuck me!"

Bobby didn't need the written invitation, as he lifted her up and brought to the bed, putting himself on top of her.

"Come on, fuck me" – whispered Athena again, making all Bobby's blood to concentrate in his penis and pulsing.

Finally he entered her fully. Athena couldn't suppress her cry, when his penis finally filled her.

"Oh fuck me! Fuck me hard, Bobby! Fuck me!" - she begged.

"Oh damn I want you so badly, baby" - Bobby whispers, stroking her butt cheeks and smacking them, stroking and smacking, stroking again and smacking that its skin got red, and the mix of pain and pleasure totally turned off Athena's brains.

He was pounding and ramming into her so desperately like if their life depends on that.

"You're beautiful, you're the sexiest, you're my goddess, you're my dream" – He whispered thrusting wildly into her.

Athena felt she was close again, but she had other plans on how to finish this. She pulled him out of her and changed position. Now she wanted to be on top of him. Bobby lied down on the bed and placed his head between her legs, while she was moving herself to his penis. Holding her hips tightly with his big strong hands, he almost made her sit on his face and licked her pussy all over, while she moaned in her fist.

After a while Athena moved away from his head and finally reached his cock, lowering herself onto it and started to move, feeling ecstatic fullness and his hands, stroking her back and squeezing her breasts.

"Help me, I'm so close" – she whispered not being sure if he knows how though.

But he felt her so good. Placing his finger on her clit and circling it, he got her over the edge in a moment.

"I'm coming again!" – cried Athena.

"Yes, baby, come for me! You're so gorgeous and you loved that ride, don't you?" – replied Bobby.

"Oh yes! Yes!" – she husked back.

"Oh how I loved fucking you and watch you all sweaty, horny and wet, you feel so good, baby" – he almost swallowed the words, when his release overcame him.

They continuing to move slower and slower until she lied down on top of him, still holding Bobby Jr

inside her.

"Oh God….I have no words… I'm in paradise" – said Bobby after they lied couple of minutes in silence.

They were lying completely worn out and sated in the bed, having no energy even for taking a shower.

"I 'm sorry that my words hurt you... I didn't mean it the way it sounded. I'm not ashamed of you. Not at all… I was just a bit anxious about what people in the community would say… "Oh Athena is so unbearable, so impossible to live with, that poor Michael turned into a gay and ran away. But this bitch didn't stop, she sold herself to a white dude and acts like everything is okay." I was almost hearing their voices... I know it's stupid to pay attention to such people, but I just had no energy to go through this... And it would be even worse, if that thing between us won't work out, and so they'll say I'm so horrible that you ran away too. .. And besides... it was such an awful day at work, I was just totally drained emotionally... too tired to go out… It had nothing to do with you…" – quietly explained Athena.

"I see, it's okay baby. I'm sorry, I didn't think about amount of strength that you will need to go through people's gossips… And I didn't think about your possible fears and anxieties… I've just booked that table in the Korean restaurant and believed that I can convince you to go. And when you refused, and I just…" – Bobby responded just as quietly gently stroking Athena's back.

"…And then I hit you with those words about hiding your secrets for many years… I didn't think in that moment. I just wanted you to stop making me go out… Also I wanted to have sex right after the dinner… And we wouldn't be able to do it in the restaurant." – She said cunningly smiling.

"Yeah, right…" – Bobby smirked back.

"… I won't run away from you, Sergeant, you're too sexy" – he said after the pause.

"Smooth talker. Come on get up, we owe your people a dinner".


End file.
